About Neurodiversity

About Asperger Relationships

​​Neurodiverse couples in which one partner has Aspergers can be particularly challenging because each partner has a different way of perceiving the world, processing information, and communicating. 


Asperger traits are not good or bad, but when the two members of a couple experience their internal and external worlds in such different ways, the difference can create conflict.



How Asperger Traits Affect Neurodivese Couples

These are the main areas that the partner with Aspergers struggles with:


• Intimacy and Emotional Connection

• Communication (listening and speaking)

• Social Behavior

• Sensory Issues

• Anxiety

• Developmental Delay

• Obsessive Thoughts

• Executive Function

• Rigidity

• Slow Cognitive Processing



Common conflicts expressed by the spouses/partners of adults with Asperger’s include:


• I don’t feel an emotional closeness with my partner.

• My partner and I can't communicate.

• My partner is very smart but seems to lack common sense.

• My partner doesn’t initiate or follow through with household chores; I have to manage everything.

• My partner has a collection that take over the house.

• My partner and I can't go out socially as a couple


Articles about Asperger's, Neurology and Relationships

by Grace Myhill and Dania Jekel


Neurology Matters: Recognizing, Understanding, and Treating Neurodiverse Couples in Therapy, March 2015


Asperger Marriage: Viewing Partnerships Thru a Different Lens, December 2008



What should you do if you think you are in a neurodiverse couple?
Call or email me for a free phone consultation to discuss if you may be in a neurodiverse couple and what your next steps may be.


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© 2019 by Grace Myhill, MSW

    Grace Myhill, MSW  617-504-3116 | Email Grace